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Daniel Ford Lexus

Daniel Ford Lexus was born on August 28, 2016 in St. Clare Medical Center in Makati City.  He saw the world first at 8:48 am with the help of my very good obstetrician, Dra Virginia Espiritu. He was born 9.78lbs via caesarian section. Big boy, right?

On his third day of life, he was diagnosed with Tetralogy of Fallot. He was born with a broken heart. Wikipedia says, Tetralogy of Fallot is a congenital heart disease that is present at birth. His pedia-cardiologist, Dra. Cecil Regino of Medical Centre Manila, explained that this disease is commonly called "blue baby". It is called "tetralogy" because there are four defects: ]

  • a ventricular septal defect, a hole between the two ventricles
  • pulmonary stenosis, narrowing of the exit from the right ventricle
  • right ventricular hypertrophy, enlargement of the right ventricle
  • an overriding aorta, which allows blood from both ventricles to enter the aorta

Fordy, as what we called him was far from being a blue baby. He never turned blue until the day he died. Weird, right? He is scheduled to have an open heart surgery two before his first birthday but he never lived to have the chance to be treated. He was called by Papa Jesus back at the age of 5 months and 19 days. 

I was devastated. Almost died crying. I had never-ending whys. Why my Fordy? Why so young? Why did he have to be sick? Why?  Why? 

But I hold on to my faith. I know God has better plans. I am learning to cope with sadness and longing every day. And that is why I created this blog. It is as if I am still talking to him like I always did. 

I think I can never recover from the pain. Not soon. In God's time, maybe. Maybe.